How to Improve Confidence
Confidence shows something about yourself. It is the way you carry yourself in public whether you know it or not. Some people like to be around confident people. Some people don’t because they find them arrogant. But arrogance comes from being overconfident. This post will only show you how to be confident and it is from there that you can choose how to control your confidence.
What is confidence? Confidence is having full trust in yourself to do an act, despite whatever fears, worries, or anxieties you have. Low self-esteem people usually have low confidence, as they shy away from the spotlight and do whatever it takes to subtly escape the task under pressure. High self-esteem people usually prefer to be in the spotlight and enjoy doing the task as they might find it exciting or a challenge.
The point is confidence is important whether or not you’re in a social atmosphere and can give you high rewards when faced in a difficult situation.
- Making new friends for the first time
- Asking somebody out on a date
- Holding a conversation with a higher authority person
- Expressing an opinion in a group
- Going through a job interview
- Performing on stage
- Giving a speech
- Simply going through life’s daily tasks
We all know what it feels to have a lack of confidence: we become nervous, we become sweaty, our palms get clammy, the excuses start to come in, and we end up back in that original state feeling like we just can’t break out of that barrier. So let’s break out of that barrier. These following steps will help you improve your confidence.
Accept Your Flaws First
First, you must accept your flaws. Why is this? People with low self-esteem usually will have low confidence. This means that they do think they are a worthy enough person to perform tasks around other people. They rely on others or look for other’s permission before doing an act. Realize that everyone has flaws and no one is perfect!
It doesn’t matter if you have a mentality that you will always mess things up, you have had a bad history, you get embarrassed easily, or you find a part of yourself physically unattractive, everybody has flaws and insecurities just like you and the difference between confident people and unconfident people is that confident people have learned to accept their flaws and like themselves for who they are. You must start from the inside first before you work your way to other people, and it begins with accepting your flaws as it is.
Not Caring About What Other People Think
Confidence comes from not letting other people’s thoughts or opinions put you down or stop you from performing. It comes from not caring about what other people. It comes from indifference. People’s opinions or criticism to you isn’t a big deal to you. It’s not like your being rude or selfish, which is not the intention, but you don’t let people stop you from doing what you want to do. This is a very important step because if you always worry about what other people think, then you start to let them think for you. Their thinking should not influence your actions, as you’re thoughts are just as capable as anyone’s else’s.
Believing in Yourself
You must adopt an I-can-do-it attitude! You believe in yourself to do anything you want to do. It is yourself and nobody else that you need to carry out the action. You always say to yourself, “I believe in myself and I can do this, even when others don’t believe in me.” When you constantly make these affirmations to yourself over and over again, you’ll start to create faith in yourself to carry out what it is that you fear, worry, or are anxious about. You must combine this faith with belief, the belief in yourself and only yourself to do what needs to be done. You can do it!
Always Practice Being Proactive
You are responsible for the events that happen in your life. They do not unravel or unfold themselves in front of you the way you like it. This means that in order to be confident, you must practice being proactive in life. Proactive people take the initiative. They don’t wait for things to happen. They are not passive nor are they reactive. The make things happen on their own and take charge, instead of sitting around all day and whining about wishing to be more of what already are. They can be more but it means taking a proactive approach wherever one goes.
You can constantly practice being proactive in your everyday encounters with people. Be the first one to start conversation, invite a friend to lunch, express an opinion, get work done, whatever it takes to practice this art rather than stay in a passive, thinking mode.
These are the four things that make up a confident person. Don’t start doing the last step before you do the first one. Start from accepting yourself first which can be simply reminding yourself that your flaws are “okay” and that it’s time to move on to focus the energy on something else. Consistently do this, or do things that make you happy and feel good and you’ll realize that your insecurities are small matters. They shouldn’t be holding down your confidence, and also shouldn’t the reasons stoppng you from the things you want really to do in life.
When you have accepted yourself, then you can gradually work your way up to the three other things mentioned such as not caring so much about what other people think, believing in yourself, and always take a proactive approach wherever you go and whatever situation you happen to be in. By constantly practicing this, you’ll start to have better body language, you’ll start to feel better about yourself, and you’ll be able to do the carry out the things that you have wanted to do that you couldn’t in the past. But most importantly, you’ll have improved your confidence and be a more confident person not only around other people, but in yourself.